With recent fake news about Britney Spears being preggers with her third runt… I mean child… and that followed by fake news about her having a miscarriage [or maybe some of it was real?], I’m thinking California’s Child Services agency (or whatever they call it) should slap a chastity belt on the former Mouseketeer (or whatever semblance normalcy she once was) and her famestruck vajajay. (And please revoke her driver’s license, someone.)

And while they’re at it, do something to K-Fed, who’s on, what, his fourth kid. The guy barely works, yet he’s one of the most influential people under 45. Sure he is. What great role models: screw rich, disturbed starlets, get’em preggers, then try to take their money. Are men the new golddiggers?