Love ya, Jack, but 9,000? That’s the number of children Jack Nicholson says he could be the father of, given how “free” his lifestyle was years ago. Sure his comment is off the cuff, but yeah riiiiiight. He does in fact have four children birthed by three women. Player!! I never knew. Maybe he’s responsible for most of female Hollywood being pregnant?

The mother of Angelina Jolie’s adopted daughter Zahara has spoken out, saying she has never disputed the adoption. The young woman, Mentwabe Dawit, admits that the baby was a product of rape and though her mother was understanding, she had trouble feeding Zahara, then named Yemsrach (”good news” in Amharic). She ran away and her mother, who feared her dead after a fruitless search, then put the baby up for adoption.

Mentwabe feels that the baby is fortunate to have been adopted by someone as famous as Jolie.

Hollyweirdos are breeding like rabbits this year. In case you’ve been under a rock for a while, the latest celebrities to announce or otherwise indicate they’re pregnant are:

1. Nicolette Sheridan from Desperate Housewives.
2. Jeri Ryan from Shark, and previously as a Borg in a Star Trek series.
3. Posh Spice (reputed), from nothing important - unless you count Spice World (the Spice Girls movie) as being important.
4. Brooke Burke, who’s constructing her fourth child (and still looking incredible).
5. Halle Berry, from Swordfish, X-Men and loads more - though there’s rumors that French Canadian model hubby Gabriel Aubry refuses to move from New York to LA, where Halle wants to raise the baby boy once he’s born.
6. Jennifer Lopez, from many half-assed movies (she should have stuck to being a dancer on In Living Color).
7. Nicole Richie from nothing important, unless you like the mindlessness of A Simple Life.

Celebs who plan to do the horizontal tango in the future, to spawn, include Sarah Michelle Gellar and Eva Longoria (whose name always sounds like Evil Ongoria when it’s spoken on TV).

Nancy Grace, who just had twins, has been hospitalized after giving birth to premature babies - but is in good condition.

View co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck - who verbally tusseled with former co-host Rosie O’Donnell quite often before going on maternity leave - recently had a baby boy. Today, she called in to The View and announced the name of her new baby: Taylor Thomas Hasselbeck, who weighed just under 8 lbs at birth. Husband Tim is an Arizona Cardinals backup quarterback.

Elisabeth is one of many celebs who are either pregnant or who have just given birth. It’s like someone flew over Hollyweird and impregnated most of the female celebs.